I suppose I should tell you all about the finer things of life. About the drive I went on this morning, how pretty it was to see the sun budding behind the trees. To spot the kangaroo who was staring at me as I drove by. Or the cows that made the morning chorus.
Or perhaps I should tell you about my time with God last night as I drove around Melbourne for 2 hours. Taking a pit-stop to visit Butterfly Girl
, a beautiful friend I had not seen in about four years.
But no, rather, I will recount the events that took place early this morning.
At 4:30am I was awoken by a deadly smell. It was so deadly that it shook my body, awaking me from my deep sleep. All my senses were on the alert. Panic set in.
What was that smell?!!!
Still in a dream state I began to imagine myself lying atop a dead carcus. Or worst yet, a pile of poo. Groaning I leaned over and switched on my lamp. For a moment I layed there with my eyes squeezed tightly shut, afraid of what may meet me.
It was only discovered that I was alone in my room. Everything was in perfect order. Except for that smell!
Covering my nose and my mouth I ventured out of my bedroom. Looking this way and that I was once again met with a nothing. Just a smell that could wake the dead. As I crept out of my bedroom the smell got worst. I could feel my insides squirming. My throat began to clamp up.
Eventually I reach the laundry, it seems that the smell was taking on a new level. Taking in a deep breath I slowly opened the laundry door.
It was horrible.
It was disgusting.
Vomit was climbing up my throat.
Greater than my imagination could ever fathom, I was met wtih a deadly sight. In the middle of the laundry floor was a big pile of dog poo. May I be graphic for a moment? It wasn't just poo. But it was worst. It looked like a pile of mud. Enough to fill a bucket two times. However, it didnt' end there. Not only was there the pile, but spread across the floor was all this poo. It was smeared into the tiles. On the walls. EVERYWHERE!
Eyes watering, body shaking, throat closing over I ran for it. Straight for my parents room.
MUM !!! DAD !!! GET UP NOW!!!
The rest of the morning was met with the exciting job of cleaning it up.