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Monday, January 1, 2007
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Two-thousand-and-seven, about HIM.
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So, here we are. Just over 3 hours into two-thousand-and-seven. How am I feeling? I'm feeling great. My first action for the year was to pray it in. To prophesy and to declare. I know that this year God is going to do big things. I know that this year I'm going to grow and change and learn and change some more. In my spirit I just feel that this is going to be different.
I want to know Jesus more. I want to be so much closer to Him. I want to be used by Him more. I want to serve Him with everything I have. I just want everything that God has for me this year. This year I want 2007 to be about HIM and not me.
Two weeks ago I was lying on my bed crying. I screwed up again. Let God down. I was on my bed repenting. Crying. Feeling like a piece of garbage. And ever so lovingly I felt the presence of God comfort me, forgive me, and show me His grace. As I continued lying there crying, falling into a self-pity-party, I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me to stand on my feet. Grudgingly I obeyed. Shoulders slumped. Face looking to the ground. He spoke.
"Go to your friends house and pray for her eyesight." My friend was a non-christian. We were highschool mates. She had been lying in bed for the past week recovering from eye surgery. She couldn't see out of them because of the surgery.
"What! No God! How could I? After everything!" Crossing my arms I sat back down on my bed. Me? He wanted to use ME?! A sinner. A nobody. Someone who breaks the heart of my King?
"Yes..." He says. He then began to show me that it wasn't about me, but about Him. Knowing not to fight with the Creator of the Universe, I grabbed my keys and my purse and left the house. Drove to the supermarket to buy her a block of chocolate, and cried my way over. Pounding on the steering wheel. Praying. Asking God for help. Not sure what to do, how to say it. My friend had a closed heart towards God and the things of God. She didnt' believe. We would catch up every three months, and every three months she would once again say 'no' to my asking of her to church. She knew it all. I had told her. I would always share what God had been doing in my life, the trials and the victories.
"It's not about you, it's about Me." He would say again.
Arriving at the house I nervously knocked on the door. Her mother answers and smiles directing me towards my friends room. She whispers to me, telling me that she isn't sure if my friend was asleep or not. I knock on the door, heart suddenly filled with compassion and excitement. This isn't about me, this is about HIM and my friend.
Not about me.
Stepping into the room I see that it is pitch black. The room was a mess. My friend is lying on the bed.
"Hello..." I say. She smiles. I walk over to the bed and sit down next to her. Her eyes are closed, unable to open them as a result of the surgery. We talk and laugh, I give her the block of chocolate, update her on my week and ask her how she is going.
"I"m okay..." She says uncertainly. She feels lonely, rejected, out of place. I'm her first visitor since the surgery. She can't do anything but lie there and daydream.
"Is it okay if I pray for you?" I ask. A smile parts on her lips, surprising the both of us.
"Would love you to..." Placing my hand in her hand I pray a quick prayer for her, asking that she would know the love that God has for her, and that God would heal her eyes. Nothing happened. No healing. No miracle. But I knew in my spirit that God did something. Hugging her I said my goodbyes as she thanked me over and over again.
Two days later my friend SMS's me. Thanking me. She could see again. I wrote back "love ya".
But tonight... tonight something shifted. My phone rings, it is her. Something has changed. The tone on her voice, it sounded like she was about to burst.
"I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU! YOU'LL BE SO EXCITED!" It sounded like she was jumping up and down.
"What is it!?" Naturally, I was jumping too.
"You'll never guess!"
"Just tell me!"
"I'm COMING TO YOUR CHURCH NEXT WEEKEND!".
Half-laughter and half-crying resulted from that phone call. I couldn't believe it. After hanging up I was stunned. My friend. The one I had been praying for for years. The one that was never interested. Didn't believe. Would tell me over and over again that it wasn't for her. My friend. The one who didn't want a bar of it. Would rather go drinking, would rather be anywhere else but church. She now wanted to come to church? She wanted to check out this God?
Again He speaks... "It's because you made it about Me..."
Two-thousand-and-seven. A year about Him and not about me.Labels: Being with Jesus, Used by God |
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posted by Samantha Louise
3:14 AM
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Is chocolate the way to a girl's heart?
It's realy exciting to read that she's coming to your church. I hope she won't just go once! The years of your friendship have counted, God has used that richness, that genuineness. Your friend knows she can trust you, she knows that you aren't just trying to convert her, and that you will love her regardless. There is some great character in there.
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Is chocolate the way to a girl's heart?
It's realy exciting to read that she's coming to your church. I hope she won't just go once! The years of your friendship have counted, God has used that richness, that genuineness. Your friend knows she can trust you, she knows that you aren't just trying to convert her, and that you will love her regardless. There is some great character in there.